Sepatah dua kata

hai kawan2, lama dah kn x menulis dkt cni. since tgh nk tunggu subuh, might as well write a lil sumthg sumthg in here. x byk, sket pun jadila kn. sorry la bg sape2 yg singgah, tp xde cite baru. bukan xnk tulis, tp pintu dkt hati ni hari tu tertutup kejap. skrang dah terbukak nih, dah ok sket kot? leh la kite borak2 kt cni lg ek.

first and foremost, nk ucapkn berbyk2 terima kasih yg tak terhingga kpd sume kawan2 yg mendoakn kesihatan dan kesejahteraan tok. tp tok skrang dah pun di bawah lindungan dan kasih sayang Allah, dan Allah lebeh lagi menyayangi tok. jadi dimohon agar sume kawan2 pun mendoakn lagi kesejahteraan dan ketenteraman tok di sana, amin.

secondly, terima kasih jugak buat kawan2 yg mengucapkn selamat berpuasa. dah setengah bulan dah kite berpuasa. bile solat witir pun dah mula baca doa qunut, barula perasan yg kite dah nk dkt raya dah ek. tp aiseh, raya kali ni mcm x brapa nk best je. adakah korang pun terasa mcm tu jugak? mcm ada satu kehilangan dah setiap kali tibanya raya. dulu semestinya perasaan gembira menanti satu syawal, tp kini lebeh kepada sayu je bila menghampiri syawal...

alahai sedehnya mode utk menulis kali ni. ntah pasal la memanjang je sedehnya. ble la nk up sket perasaan down ni. anyway, since hari ni pun cuti nuzul al-quran adala sket rasa gumbira, sbb x pyh mengadap budak2 itu. yg budak2 ini pun satu, dah tawu skrang bulan puasa, lagi nk menaik temperature aku memanjang. luluh jiwa raga bile ada budak ni biadab sgt dgn aku hari itu, dan budak itu sudahpun menerima balasan di atas perbuatannya itu. mmg terasa kesian, tp you gotta pay wat you have to pay la kn, or in other word which is my ultimate motto dat i keep dearly in hart in case i did sumthg totally wrong is berani buat, berani tanggung. ni mmg sedari boleh ingat lg, kata2 azimat ni mmg digenggam dalam tgn klu ada terbuat sesuatu yg tak berapa betul. misalnya, umm... klu lets say terfly ke waktu boring2 dulu, terbergaduh dgn org ke bile x puas hati, terkureng sket ke dgn beberapa org dan yg lain-lain yg sama waktu dgnnya.

yea saya tau perbuatan2 sebegini adalah salah, dan harusnya meminta maaf dan azam di hati xkn buat lg. but again did dat, done dat. apa yg penting sekarang, kite haruslah memandang ke kaki langit dan terus menuju ke puncak jaya dgn penuh semangat dan mohon agar diberi kekuatan dan ketabahan utk mengharungi perit getir hidup ini, aja aja fighting!!!!

mcm nilah yg selalu aku buat utk menggalakkn diri sendri bile ada terasa kurang. galakan adalah penting supaya semangat kite utk terus berjuang ada. jgn sampai setiap hari yg kita lalui tiada beza dgn semalam, umpama macam mayat hidup; hidup segan mati x mahu. biarlah Allah tahu yg kite sentiasa berusaha utk menuju ke jalan-Nya, biarlah org di sekeliling kita tahu yang walau bagaimana susah pun hidup ini, selagi belum sampai nafas terakhir, selagi belum tutup mata ini, kita adalah seorang pejuang, yg berjuang utk terus bernafas di bumi ini, yg berjuang demi mencapai tujuan dan matlamat sebenar kite diturunkn di bumi ini. jadi apa matlamat dan tujuan kite? mestilah nk berjaya di dunia dan akhirat dan pendek kata, nak masuk syurgalah kn? apa yg selama ni kite buat dkt dunia ni, x lain dan x bukan utk topupkn bekalan kite supaya imbangan duga kita nanti lebeh berat kepada nak masuk syurga. jadi sama2 lah kite menggalakkan diri sendiri, keluarga, kawan2 sekeliling kite supaya sama2 bekerja keras utk memastikan kite adalah salah seorg daripada bergazilion penghuni syurga kelak. sesungguhnya semua janji Allah adalah benar, dan kite pun haruslah menunaikan janji kite pada Allah juga.

hmmm... ni pun dah beratus2 patah kata dah ni. memandangkn subuh pun dah masuk, haruslah menunaikan janji yg seterusnya kepada Allah. akhir kata, terima kasih kepada semua kawan2 dan mohon ampun dan maaf bagi setiap kesilapan lalu. semoga ramadan kali ini membawa rahmat dan baraqah yg tersendiri. jaga diri dan teruskan berusaha!!!

Long Lost Love

sedehnye bunyi title post kali nih kan? hmm yeah, at the time being kinda feel dis way. so lemme express my sorrow a bit in here shall me?

1st, my sista sudah balik ke universitasnya. dah dua minggu rasanya die udah pulang. i miss her like a lot!!!! sekarang saya tdo sorg2, dah xde sape nk teman. i wish my h2b can teman me tdo soundly at nite. perhaps next year ek? but then again, il miss my nights with kak lin. seronok je bersembang (paksa kak lin dgr =p) smpi she gave me all the sign for me to stop mumblings. miss watching ANTM and parental control, miss bancuhkn milo/teh tarik/roti bakar and mkn midnight fatty snacks together, basically i miss her a lot!!! sgt mcm a huge lost in my life, sob sob. out of all these drama, bulan depan die balik lg heheh, to celebrate raya with us. so xdela lama sgt utk jupe kak lin lg.

2nd, my liltlest brother si naim itu telah patah tangan. dua2 tulang tgn kiri die patah. die jatuh dgn skolah, slps die kejar kawan die. pjg sgt storynye, tp pendekkn, dienye tgn sudah patah. i found out the story after i got back home from skool. tgk rumah senyap sunyi xde org, called mak. mak tgh dkt hospital, tgn naim kena simen and die tgh tdo. so mak tunggu smpi naim bangun, baru balik rumah. at the time, wad sume katil penuh, so kena balik rumahla.

smpi dkt rumah, he looked in a lot of pain. me seeing me liltlest brother like dat, sgt teary eyes and my heart ached. kesiannye tgk adikku ini. mak ckp satu tulang jer doktor berjaya betulkn balik,yg tulang satu lagi tu masih mcm bentuk v. so kena wat operation last tuesday. i was like, biar betul. tp mmg betullah kn kena operate. naim kena hari khamis,tp on saturday die dah happy2 jer. wlupn tgn die patah, he manage not to skip solat. hari yg die patah tgn tu pun, solat zohor dgn asar die qadha on the same day, rite after die solat maghrib. itulah naim, selagi die tak solat, sgt resah semacam jer. okay, mcm budak2 lain, die xdela solat awal waktu. xdela azan terus solat. wat i mean to say is im so proud of him wlupn sakit die tak tinggal solat.

so last monday, naim dah kena masuk wad sbb esoknya nk operate. lps sekolah, i went straight to the hospital. naim start kol 12 mlm, dah kena puasa. mlm tu mak yg teman naim kt ward. aku lps borak2 dgn mak n naim, kenala berundur dulu sbb hari pun dah makin lewat, n aku kena drive balik sorg2 pulak tu, huhu.

next morning, dlm pukul 8 aku dah gerak ke hospital. mak tgh baca majalah, abah tgh baca paper. naim tgh main psp. aku duduk jerla atas katil smbil mengacau naim main game. pukul 9.30 barula ada sorg misi dtg suruh tukarkn baju naim. i was damn nervous sbb i knew da time is up, dat my brother is gona be there in the operating room. praying hard, i knew dat dis is the moment where hope and faith intertwine. he's in the doctor's hand and all we can do is to pray dat evrythg will turn out to be alright.

pukul 10.30 misi (heh aku mmg suka panggil nurse misi sbb mcm lg kiut jer dgr) bwkkn katil n wheeled my brother to ot. kitorg pun ikut jerla misi2 itu. diorg tolak laju betul, x larat nk kejar. 10.45, lps bacakn form consent tu, and after salam2 naim pun masuk dlm ot. i wish boleh temankn dier smpi dlm, sbb nampak dier mcm sayu sgt lps salam2. i hate seeing those eyes, but it must be done so you can get better okay naim?

da day before, aku dah bgtau yg aku akn masuk skolah lmbt since my class pun start lmbt. anyway, aperla sgt budak2 nongoi itu berbanding adik ku yg sorg itu. okay fine, bukan semua budak nongoi, tp i wana be here for my brother. kena buang skolah pun like i care! bcoz for this 5 month aku buat keje amal jer nih since my gaji x dapat2 lg. ntah hape2 kn, seb baik aku duduk dgn keluarga aku, minyak kete, duit mkn, bayarkn kete sume fully support by my beloved parent. klu tidak, mau kena mkn pasir hari2. dis week dahla kena buat dat stupid clipping booklet, i hate clipping da booklet, i got paper cut alover my hand n it damn hurt evrytime i sprayed water at my hands. wat get me furious is dat after al those saket pinggang work, the budak2 just toss dat thingy away n never bother to do it at al. budak2 yg perasan pandai pun x buat kejadah pun. wat am i membebel about, dis entry is bout naim, not bout me. tp nak menyelit jugak rasa x puas hati ni. wat da heck, i mean as if they care about me, org baru i must say. yg boleh diarahkn buat sume keje2 yg ntah hape2. wat ever, i'd jst hv to wait til the end of year. selagi blum smpi masa, lets just smile n keep on smiling , shall me? =')

since pukul 12.30 naim x keluar lg dari ot, aku terpaksa jugakla ke sekolah dgn berat hati. lps salam2 mak abah, aku pun pi jela skolah wlupun dlm hati x ingin sgt nk pegi. to make thg worst, jadual dah bertukar. skrang aku kena amik jadual sorg cikgu ni, n my jadual kena direliefkn. korg x paham? aku pun malas nk terangkn coz it sucks, so sucks til i just hope i can fast forward the time till the end of this december. al i can say is, im no longer ajar form1 only, kena ajar form 2 skali. n dapat kelas yg nongoi2 atau dalam bahasa yg kureng, klas reject, yg sume cikgu pun xnk masuk klu boleh. n to look at the bright side, aku dpt subjct yg ringan, such as sivik n moral, subjct yg x masuk periksa. no more ajar science, which is great sbb sblm aku masuk kelas, kena study dulu, yeah to refreshen da long lost memory. tp i guess ajar sivik xde hal la kn. setakat kelentong2 sket, muahahahaha. just kidding, il teach based on text book sahaja, malasla nk cari info lebeh2. beside mcmla budak2 ni interested sgt nk blaja sivik. likewise, klula diorg ni sivic minded sgt, xknla pintu kelas dah smpi berlobang2, cermin pecah, paip tandas sume habis tercabut. and again, fine its up to the teachersla to teach these brats to have a mind with sivic. and again, the simple question will rise again from the grave: what the hell the parent is doing at home? x ajar ke anak2 sendiri smpi dlm otak x abis2 nak vandalismkn sume brg n asyik nak menyusahkn cikgu kt skolah? who da heck am i to care bout sum1 else children? again, no string attachla kn. abis je loceng, im outta here.

all in all, yes im determine to give my best and giving my best intention to teach my students is wat i always intended to do. i love my students (in a appropriate love as a teacher shud love her student la kn) and i want them to excel and pass with flying colors. tp again, its getting hard to get tru their heads these days. asyik nk protes n terlalu perasan diorg pandai sgt. wat everla kn, sumtimes i just humiliate them (in a good way) so dat they know at their age, they arent mr. know-it-all sgt. there's thg only time and experience can be the teacher. and we all been there as adolescence. and i know the tricks on their sleeves but again ive to act all professional and pretend i never know such thg. yeah rite, ive been there, and done dat brats.i was a handful myself but i manage not to make my parent or my teachers went coo coo evrytime they see me. i dont know, is dis my payback aftr wat i did and done in da past? hehe, guess bring it on then! just gimme the taste of my own medicine =P

pjgnye commercial break! rasa mcm malas la pulak nk cite smpi abis pasal naim. nantila next entry aku sambung pulak. sebenarnya nk tulis sket jer sbb dh lama x postkn cite. i know, mesti hampa jer kn tiap kali bukak je site ni xde post baru. so ini hanya la appetiser. main course next entry, where il tell how restless night for mak n naim the night after the operation. its heart breaking n nothing but bucket of tears seeing my brother in a lot of pain. tp, again on the bright side, hari ni cuti sekolah dah pun bermula n naim dah boleh sengih smbil gurau dgn abg die. so its a huge relief and non-stop expressing my gratitude to Allah the Merciful for His blessing upon us all.

sampai sini jerla bebelan cikgu kali ni. yea cikgu tau, cite kali ni agak pening sket, sumenye nak dicitekn in one spill. mmg sgt kelam kabut, isinya habuk tarak. tp again, dis is my thought at this very moment. so blasah jerla. grammar error, content jillo, who cares rite? ofcoz the teacher cares, tp bukankh skrang cuti skolah, so can we all have our break plz? tqvm, catch you guys later. take care and take your meals accordingly =)

Thanks a bunch!!!!

Fuish, byk sungguh komen2 yg membina daripada anda sekalian. sgt terharu rasanya. terima kasih di atas sokongan moral yg telah anda semua berikan. wat doesnt kill me, can make me stronger kn?

to elly, thanks and yup, i wont stop writing bout these darling until its time for me to finally stop, a lil bit of challange ive to face, but dats only to spice up and juice my daily routine =D

to aton, hehe baru kena puji sket terus x update hari2. mmg nak tulis, tp kinda tired sket sbb budak2 ni tgh ujian. mcm ada adrenaline rush je lps marah2 diorg, end up ive sore joints and ive a headache once a while. not to worry, il post sumthg juicy later ek aton =)

to mishika, jgnla masuk kelas cikgu nih. smlm dgn hari nih, cikgu garang sgt smpi muka budak2 perempuan semua kecut je tgk cikgu. cikgu pun takut dgn keadaan cikgu pada masa itu. im like so fierce and fury, and i dont evn like myself sbb at any moment i felt i can just lempang budak2 itu. thank god i didnt, bcoz i wana hurt no one, tp sumtime they are just too much!!! i nearly burst in tears but again i didnt. i just went outside, take a couple of huge breath and gave them a cold hard stares. tp disebabkn diorg nih mmg x reti2 bahasa, sekejap je kelas senyap. gosh i hate these brats!!!!

to fara, yes indeed, evry moment i prayed to Allah for strength and patience!!! i am determine to keep on going till the end of this year. later on, come wat may, just belasah je ek...

again, thanks a lot for my supporters, my invinsible arms and shoulders to cry on =) im very blessed to have friends likem you guys, full of supports and words of encouragements! this is the moment where all i need is comfort and here you guys are!!! got some more stories to tell, but il save it till the next post...

arghhh, esok sekolah ganti la pulak, darn it!!! mau masuk tidur awalla. till here then, take care and stay safe =)

Pichas...

Nie ha, adela sket2 gambar yg mau dipostkn. asyik ceritera jer kn, so kali nih cikgu bg visual aid gitu. so sambil tgk gambar, cikgu explain. klu x faham, boleh angkat tangan, cikgu akn terangkn lebeh detail yea. btw, gudluck and all da best utk ujian julai yg akn bermula esok!!!

gambar kt sebelah ni masa budak2 sebok buat eksperimen PEKA utk pendulum. tgkla, sempat lg nk berposingkn? janji dah siap sume report tu, cikgu pun dah x pening kepala dah. aku dah ckp yg aku akn postkn gmbr2 diorg, they doesnt seem to mind, seronok lagi adalah =D

yg ni group budak2 lelaki pulak. barula nmpk mcm tgh buat eksperimenkn? budak2 perempuan kt atas tu, kekadang nakalnye, ya rabbi!!! sakit kepala nak layan budak2 nih...

gambar ni pun letak jugakla. kang kata cikgu pilih kasih kan, asyik layan bangsa sendiri ajer. cikgu bukan mcm itu yea murid2, sumenye cikgu layan. cuma budak2 yg mcm palat je cikgu malas nak layan.

ni pulak gambar masa hari mesra pelanggan. sume tgh tunggu ibu bapa masing2 mengambil kad laporan. ni budak2 perempuan, gmbr lps ni adalah gmbr budak2 lelaki

ni adalah gambar budak2 lelaki. tak semua yg ada sbb ada ibu bapa yg dah dtg, dan ada yg pegi camping.

jadi ini adalah sebahagian gmbr budak2 yg cikgu ajar. sebenarnya ni gmbr budak2 kelas yg sama. kelas yg lain2 x sempat nak amik sbb asyik kena marah diorg je, asyik kena membebel suruh diam. jadi harap maafla sbb ada gmbr budak2 satu kelas ni sahaja.

so there you go, here's a sneak peak of our activities at skool. i shud probably make a video where i raise my voice and start yelling at these brats, tgk aksi cikgu ganas di skolah, muahahahahaha.

tp hari ni mcm slack sket. aku bengang gak klu dapat relief at a free time where i shud pray. ni dari masuk asar smpi nk abis asar ada kelas. mmg xde dasar langsung. so td aku curi masa utk solat asar kejap. smbhyg pun x menyempat sbb nk ke kelas seterusnya. dasar budak2 &*%$#, diorg bergaduhla pulak dalam kelas. kak H yg tolong settlekn sblm aku smpi ke kelas. i know its my bad, i shud hv come earlier, tp mind me, i wud rather face a thousand death daripada nk lewatkn sgt smbhyg. aku bukanla alim, tp tolongla kn, leave my space alone utk solat. time dah nk dkt maghrib xknla baru nk smbhyg kn? watevrla, td aku complain jugak, tp jawapannya, nak buat mcm mana. sakit jap kepala, i mean cikgu2 silala jgn amik cuti or asyik ada urusan luar. klu kerja lain, org tu mc ke watever, org lain xdela terasa sgt bebannya. ni klu sorg cikgu mc/watever, dah kena dapat relief. kinda suck giler, i just hate having to relief others. so note to self, jgn mc unless ure really in need. kesian mereka2 yg dah byk sgt kelas itu kena reliefkn.

itu sahaja complain dari saya, overall its a crazy day. how crazy its gonna get tomorrow? we'll see =D for da mean time, just pretend and act like ure having fun, bcoz eventually you will =)

Banyaknya...

hurmmm, klu baca blog org lain, it seems dat their lives resolve in coding, programming, meeting such and such. but in here, in the meanwhile, my writing is about my adorable murid2. so klu asyik tercerita pasal budak2 nih je, harap bersabarla ek, sbb aku pun xde cite lain nk cite. lagipun, sbb utama aku nk bercerita sbb xnk kepala penuh dgn diorg. jadi besarlah harapan sekiranya dapat bercerita dgn korang pasal budak2 ini.

hari nih mau cite ape ek?overall PEKA lagi 4 org x siap lagi out of 3 class = 138. so ada 138 reportla yg kena ditanda. so far, byk buku2 nota dan latihan budak2 dah pun ditanda. buku yg nak dibagi ke ketua bidang pun dah dibagi. plus dis week pun ada ujian julai, woohoo!!! seronok sbb satu sekolah ni will be in dead silent!!! sgt silent till you cn hear your own breath!!!

umm, i just dont get it when parents blaim the teachers if for example they are not informed by their children outrages behaviour at school. bukankah menjadi tanggungjawab ibu bapa tanya pd anak2 diorg n perihatin dgn surat2 amaran yg dah pun dipos ke rumah? for goodness sake, dlm kelas all the teachers kena control +/- 45 students. banyak x hengat tuh!!!! diorg ni pulak suka wat komplot nak memekak kt blakang. berapa kali suruh diam pun buat x heran je, kang ada yg nk kena baling dgn kasut. so to those, plz stop pointing fingers dkt cikgu2 sbb cikgu2 mmg x larat nk entertain budak yg sorang itu. the teachers had given their fullest attention and intention to the class. plz dnt add up stress n burden to the teachers. instead, jgnla bg muka sgt dkt anak2. klu diorg buat salah, tolong jgn nk backing anak2 itu, sbb lagila diorg naik syeh nanti...

for the past weeks, aku buat rules yg jgn bwk mende2 terlarang masuk makmal, klu x sume kena rampas. diorg bg alasan jadah pun, sorry il take it anyway. adik aku pun ckpla yg aku nih kejam. i know im being mean, tp budak2 nih bolehla amik balik at the end of the school year. aku pun mmg x sampai hati nk rampas, its just dat aku xnk aku yg kena blame klu meja2 kt makmal ni kena conteng. aku boleh back hand balik kata yg murid2 ku itu sume x bwk liquid, marker, highlighter and bla la la la la....

smpi hari nih, barula aku perasan yg byk gile dah aku rampas. dah nak penuh karung plastik tu. dasat jugak aku nih ek? tp skrang aku pun dah cool down, klu budak2 ni bwk, aku cuma x bg diorg pki terang2an. mcm sorok2 bwk gitu. sbb aku tgk bukan diorg yg conteng, siap mengadu lagi ada. ada sekali tuh budak kelas mana ntah, mmg conteng melampau betul, lucah sgt! aku tgk pun geli giler. aku pun bgtaula sofea, pembantu makmal, minta die cucikn. so budak2 ni pun dah pahamla kenapa sume mende tuh xleh dibawa masuk ke makmal. slalu jugakla aku round tgk diorg bawak ke tak. alhamdulillah, budak2 ni dah jadi baik orgnya. suka sangat =)

ada sket gmbr2 nk dipostkn, nantila diletakkn di sini. rasanya itu jerla kot bebelan kali nih. mau turun, nak borak2 dgn mak dgn abah. kepada sume, live life to the max =D

Baru Ku Tahu

umm, just now i googled a little sumthg bout gstt, little did i know dat im very fortunate and damn lucky to be able to work as a gsttian. i thought there's not so many out there is a teacher wana be. and again little did i know, many really wanted dis job...

at first, for me, gstt is sumthg to past the time, i shud say. i do love the 'teacher' title, darn happy hearing the murid2 calling me teacher and greet me as a teacher. but when thinking dat is going to be over after a certain period of time, i must say dat, gstt is just a mere dream. rite now, all the teachers are planning for the next year, the timetable, wat subjct to be teach next year, such and such... but then, i excluded myself from participating in their chats with a smile, knowing dat im not gonna be here the next year....

so as to speak, im living every moment as a teacher, knowing dat the past remain as a history, da future is another story. not putting any high hopes, a path to become a teacher is never a certain for me. so to be or not to be, still remain as a huge question and a blurry vision indeed...

to bear in mind dat, having dis wonderful experience as a gsttian is sumthg i shud be grateful of. i met new friend, new environment, and many interesting students. ive experience the interviews, met new faces, all in all, the process to get to this point today is a memoir dat ill cherish the rest of my life.


why am i writing all dis innuendoes? as if tomorrow is da last day i can be call as a teacher? i dont kno, its just hit me hard when hearing these teachers making their plan for the next year as i know im not gonna be around....

but on the sunny side of this dreading story, the next year, i wont hv to face this such hassle anymore. moreover, maybe i can be a housewife? (if im married at the end of this year dat is).

so enough thinking bout the future as im damn happy living in the moment. yeas, im happy to say dat my students is so nice today, probably the baraqah of friday! they did behaved quite adorable today. the nongoi2 murid did their PEKA report as expected, but due to lack of time, they didnt quite finish it yet. so i will give them time to do it next week then.

however, the last 2 period really boiled my blood to the max. this one particular murid, ive no idea wats wrong him, he had a mouth dat cannot be shut no matter wat i say to him. the worst part is, bcoz of him, the whole lot became infected with his obnoxious behaviour. after i wrote a few lines in the discipline book, he finally know how to shut his stinkin mouth. so da class went silence and i cud teach in peace. till the bell went off, the moment of silence is still there...

before i went bck home, this one teacher asked me wether i could come tomorrow to assist him with futsal. damn rite i wana be there, but i remain cool and act cool as if im too busy tomorrow. a few chat bout dis and dat, i said yes and by 8.00 am i shall be there. hopefully, im goin with kak lin and afterward we cud go jolly2 together, hehe =P. so for tomorrow, i dont know wat to expect, but with high hope i do wana have gud time with my sista =)

till here, till next post. have a great weekend evry1 =D

A Gratitude

Sangat rasa puas hati hari nih sbb kelas yg paling susah nk dgr ckp, dh siapkn PEKA! woohoo!!!! i dont have to gv myslf a headache evrytime thnkin bout PEKA. ada lagi satu kelas, budak2 nye tahap degilnya hardcore jugak. haish, dgn sgt besar harapan, esok diorg dptla siapkn. then bolehla aku start menanda report2 budak2 nih.

folio geografi pun dah pouring in, sgt seronok tgk hasil kreativiti diorg nih. sejuk mata memandang gitu. buku nota pun dah mintak diorg hantar n dah siap tandakan pun. cuma latihan budak2 nih kena semak. so far, my workload still xdela memenuhkan meja. masih boleh lagi bernafasla kiranya.

esok adala pulak meeting geografi. slalunya hari jumaat, aku mmg suka pegi lmbt. esok kenala dtg awal. haish, aperla yg nak dimesyuaratkn. aper2 ajela, janji cpt abis. aku akn mendengar dgn penuh kusyuk dan masyuk =D

utk buku cuti sekolah terancang, aku kena buat soalan utk geografi. and aku x cari lgpun soalan2 itu =p nantila dis weekend aku start diggin for the questions. anyway, dahla kena collect kn soalan2 itu, nanti kena stapler kn lagi. hari tu aku dgn fizah mmg nak muntah, tiap hari asyik ngadap booklet2 itu. nk ngadap 'org' itu lg. haish, dat time is sucks!!! then kena buat lg.

wat da heckla dis org thinking, asyik nk nyusahkn cikgu baru sahaja (not dat im complainin, hang on a sec... yes i am!!!) wat ever, im done till dis december. so for this meanwhile, kena tahan sketla dan bykkn bersabar. sila bawak bersabar yea cikgu ain alida...

okla, think gona switch off the light now. esok mau bangun awal. till here, take care =)

Im Still Thinkin

Sempena bulan Rejab yg penuh dgn baraqah nih, aku dah pun start puasa since minggu lps. only on weekdays, weekend hari bersantap dgn penuh kusyuk dan tawadhuq skali, hehe.

i did noticed dat, perangai budak2 nih ble aku puasa, mcm dengar kata sket. darah aku pun xdela mendidih sgt,stakat suam2 kuku gitu adala. dan pandai pulak amik hati aku dgn buat lawak budak2 diorg. aku pun xdela nk marah je memanjang. so basically aku pun buat psycho attack je dgn diorg. ble diorg rasa left out sbb sume pun nk belajar, slowly diorg yg hard core nie, yg xleh kelas senyap nih, bukak jugakla buku. pyscho attack yg mcm mana, basically menghorrorkn future diorg. maybe diorg pun dah slalu dgr kot,mesti cikgu2 lain dah membebel jugakkn, saying sumthg dat hit them hard. such as, klu xnk blaja end up mcm mana nanti in the future. klu suka sakitkn hati cikgu, ada ke tempat diorg kt syurga nanti. diorg klu aku sebut pasal neraka sket, baru nk insaf. drpd bising sebising alam, terus senyap. rupanya, kena slalu ingtkn diorg nih, diorg suka rupanya klu kena membebel ala ala ceramah agama sket, drpd marah on and on bout their outrages behaviour nih.

skrang nih pun, alhamdulillah with couple of hard stares diorg dah paham dah warning aku tu. klu sebelum nih, aku tgk mcm mana pun, diorg buat selambe je. skrang diorg dah paham sket.sketla, sbb bisingnya masih ada.especially bile time loceng berbunyi,diorg pun buat mcm2 bunyi...

anyway, folio geografi dah start comin in. diorg pun dah start hantar,which is a great news.xyahla aku nk berkejar diorg mintak siapkn. due date lmbt lagi, dlm 2 minggu. dan daripada yg aku tgk, mostly dah siapkn. im very proud of you guys, keep it up yea murid2 sekalian.

PEKA pulak, nie jiwa kacau sket. ada jugak si nongoi2 ini yg liat sungguh nk siapkn. budak2 ni 1st report PEKA, aku kurung diorg dlm makmal sains tu. diorg xleh balik kelas. alhamdulillah, 1st report budak yg paling nongoi, konon2 bapak gengster, kepala ponteng kelas, pun dah siap. yg 2nd report nih, aduhai... kurung pun diorg boleh cabut jugak. main lari je bile kelas dah habis, smpi terlanggar aku kt dpn pintu tu. kureng kn budak2 nih? xpe2, esok masih ada. jgn ingt korg boleh terlepas ek. akn ku cari hingga hujung lubang cacing.

so, tu jerla bebelan kali nih. nanti sambung balik membebel ek. muchos nanchos...

A Few Words

Assalamualaikum... apa mau bebel kali nih ek? asyik membebel sorg2 je cikgu ni kan? budak2 kt blakang bukannya nk dgr pun. x kesahla diorang nk dgr ke x, janji cikgu dah menyampaikan apa yg nk disampaikn. lagipun dah diorg jugak yg xnk dgr, after all those membebel, pinches dan yg sewaktu dgnnya. i cant force them to hear my preach, so wat to do la kn? asalkn diorg x ckp yg aku nih x ngaja diorg sudah.

anyway, yes... sometime rasa mcm dah mati kutu mcm mana nk bg diorg suka blaja. ive been using various technique dah, da conventional method, da new method like pki laptop, pki pc, pasang courseware and such tp tataula knapela diorg sgt stubborn gitu. so mcm mana ek bile the end product is not produced like the customers expected?

so in the end, i decided not to marah2 sgt. kesian, i punish the whole class just for these brats. so budak2 blakang masih mcm tu jugak, masih nk brckp n xnk dgr langsung. tp again, dats their choice. so aku hanya layan budak2 yg dpn nila. diorg jerla tempat ku curahkn ilmu. budak2 blakang once a while aku suruh diorg jgn bising, suruh duduk and such so dat yg dpn leh blaja dgn jayanya. again, bukan aku yg ignore diorg. bkn aku xnk marah2 diorg. sbb aku xnk mood da whole class terganggu. yela, yg x bersalah pun kena marah, mana x semua pun xnk blaja kn? so kpd budak2 yg xnk blaja tu, i hope another 10 years or so jgn nk menyesal x sudah ok?

tengok nih, asyik membebel jer kn kejenye. nmpk sgt dah become one of those makciks yg sgt kepochi. nganga, i mean my life now is surround by these bunch of kids. so kekadang tu terkeluar jugakla pasal diorg nih kn. i try not to tell in details here, konon mcm nk private n confidential gitu. tp, klu mood dah rasa nk cite all in n out, wat to do la kn? muahahahaha gelak evil =D

main course of this entry is my sista is home!!! yea, kak lin sudah pulang bercuti. tp x lama pun, dlm sebulan sahaja. its been nearly a week dah, haish... kn best klu x keje, leh pi jalan2 suka hati dgn adikku ini. ada jugak perasaan nak monteng keje jer rasa. tp as a teacher, dats a no no! beside i hate kena relief cikgu2 yg x dtg, meski kena maki hamun dlm diam jugak klu aku pun perangai yg sama, ngenge...

guess smpi cni jerla kot. xde cite best sgt. klu nk cite pasal budak2 nih byk2la, tp malas. xnk ar penuhkn blog ni pasal diorg. baik cite pasal pokok buah2an yg sgt byk buah ni, lagi besh. so till herela bebelan dari cikgu ini. always smile n stay sane ek, heheh

Static

It's been a long static. not dat ive been avoidin bloggin, its just dat i dont have any more desire to spill my thoughts and senses in this virtual world. what i would really wish for now, is to have my other half eyes to eyes and stay with me all night. but thats a wish probably gonna take longer time to come true. how hard ive been praying lately for this, but solemnly knowing dat there's always the blessing in disguise waiting itself to be reveal.

sound poetic as i may, is not wat i intended to babble in here. just a few line about this and dat, datsal y'all. aint nothin but wats been kickin lately, n tellin da truth, i got nothg.

write all i will, but all i could think of is despair. as though the skies have fallen on me, the air was so heavy dat i cudnt breath, the cloudy days dat never seems to end, the sun as though too shy to be out again, all the butterflies the bees and the birds stop dancing. no words can describe my sorrows and grieve. i just feel teribly sad, and no reason for this.

i try to reach the end of the tunnel, but the light seems to move further and further away. i try to run but my knees are so weak. i try to scream, but im so numb i couldn't speak. so please misery go away, i really need to come out and play.

lead a happy life people, choose to smile evn for a while. you never know, the person that you smile to is the one you could fall in love to.

enough said, take care and smile =)